The construction plan
The world's largest data center. One hundred percent LEGO. Greenland for natural Arctic cooling. Denmark supplies the bricks, foots the bill, and snaps it together. I haven't asked them yet. Very nice people, the Danes. They'll probably throw in those little windows with shutters. Classy.
Technical specifications
CAPACITY: Unlimited. Bricks keep snapping together. We're looking for the really big flat pieces. Might be under the couch.
COOLING: Arctic wind through the carefully placed gaps. Also the unintentional gaps. The entire building is gaps.
POWER: One enormous battery brick. Probably red. If you find it, call campaign headquarters. The entire grid depends on it.
COMPLETION: Friday. Which Friday? Two weeks from now. Every two weeks forever.
Groundbreaking safety
Each server rack comes with a tiny yellow construction worker. My infrastructure secretary stepped on the prototype national grid barefoot and is recovering at an undisclosed LEGO hospital. You can really feel the structural integrity.
The same bricks provide perimeter security. Try running across them.